The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker

Fortunate for Nintendo when I really don’t have much going on in life, a new game, new hobby, etc. I always seem to rummage through my library and find an instant favorite such as The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker


Wind Waker was originally released on the Nintendo Game Cube, then somehow in the year of 2015-16 we all decided an HD remaster would be appropriate. Though, I’m not going to bash on the game mechanic upgrades to the HD version, for there was none to give. Here’s what happened on the Game Cube. The last game console Nintendo made for normal people, before we all developed wanking wrist syndrome from the Nintendo Wii.

Wind Waker took the 3D aspect of serious game rendering and cartooned it up with dopy onion headed characters. This indeed created at the time of release a instant review of discuss from the cretins whom are cannon die hards. While as we can all remember when it came to ‘graphics’ of the Game Cube. Let me remind you Millennial’s graphics in short looked like a skeleton with play dough skin slapped on it. Wind Waker’s graphics back then looked fine and still to this day holds up. It’s probably the only Zelda game where Link is able to make more than one emotion at a given time. From happy, sad, grimace, to angry. As opposed to the Joan Rivers plastic surgery permanent bitch face we’ve all come to know.

What I like about Wind Waker over three prior video games of the same mantra is the fact Wind Waker doesn’t sell itself seriously. Link actually has a personality we can all get along with. Sure enough, he may have a slight case of special needs throughout game play. However, he’s not ‘destined’ to be the hero in Wind Waker, unlike in previous titles where you are the hero. We all know you are the hero and there’s nothing you could do to change it. Wind Waker at least lets you come into your own. Later you can play the game through and not have to wear the usual green elf cloths. Which makes it all the more enduring to the point maybe Link (in this game) is just on a quest by happenstance.

Wind Waker’s Link in the game has a few things which is normally different to the usual cannon. Firstly, saving your sister. Drinking milk and taking photographs of things. Which is engaging, unlike the usual board out of our skulls Link who’s all about questing for a princess. However, admittedly Wind Waker does get into predetermined hero shenanigans which is what we’re here for. It’s just comes down to the delivery. At the point Zelda is barking orders to get shit done we’re already invested into the game. Literally halfway through.

I remember some time ago people were complaining about  the sailing portion of Wind Waker. Which by the way is the whole game mechanic making it vastly different in comparison to other chronicles. In the game, you do have to make lengthy journeys from point A to point B and prey to the Nintendo Gods you don’t get harassed by sea monsters. Pacing in the game at this point is sketchy at best because of the second game mechanic to this game which is the ability to change wind direction. Hence the game being called Wind Waker. You literally have to pull of the Macarena to U-turn in case of over shooting an island you meant to port at. Meanwhile if you want to figure out what island/s are even in the map, you have to find a fish. Feed it food and then bribe it to give you a map. I will say, I enjoy the nuances of the sailing bits. Mainly because it doesn’t bog down the “loading” shenanigans most games have. From normally walking down a hallway and opening a door into a separate room. This in turn does give the game a kind of ‘epic’ feeling. However later on, there is a moment you can just warp from point A to point B without really doing all the sailing bits. Which is also nice on the ‘waiting.’ Because sometimes, not all, sailing does slow the whole game down. Last but not least about the whole sailing bit is the moment we all have to search for the shards of a Triforce piece. There’s seven in total and God bless America if it doesn’t take more than 3 hours to figure out where everything is. Thank you Google Maps, for realz.


In the complain zone is the targeting system for Link. He has a way of making uninformed choices of who’s an immediate threat to him. He’s been fighting evil for decades now. His targeting system is something from the year 2000. You would think there would be some upgrades!? Apparently not, because the moment a big bad guy is about to club Link to the N64. Link becomes more concerned with a wasp flying around instead.
Meanwhile Wind Waker’s currency as a mock RPG game is fucking horrible. Out of a stock being bombs, arrows, and other random bits. Killing bad guys gives you money which by and large you’ll never have to bank because by the time you’re half way through you might as well just own a castle of your own! Meanwhile, for those in the ‘I suck at defending myself.’ Take all your jelly’s to the jelly man and he’ll make you potions which will give you health, magic or health and magic. Meanwhile, go visit your grandma on the starting island and she’ll hook you up with epinephrine shots which pretty much buff you out like Arnold Schwarzenegger. And or, you have the ultimate fuck all for this game and just kill enemy’s for hearts.

Overall, aside from the lows. Wind Waker is good. It stands on its own and in reality, that’s all we really asked for. Simply a Zelda game which didn’t really have to explain itself to the other games in the ghastly conversation of, “what part of the time line does this belong to.” How about on it’s bloody own! How about we take each game as a chapter of the same blasted characters doing something either different or the same and leave it at that! How about we all rest assured Link will always wear green cloths. Zelda is always in trouble. And there will always be some evil bastard mucking it up. Mic drop.


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