Mario Galaxy

Nintendo has been dancing with the Wii for a long enough time to hold it to its merits till the Nintendo Switch rolls around and another attempt of the Super Mario 64 lightening strike is tried again. Thusly restoring life back into the Frankenstein monster that has become the Super Mario video game saga. Nintendo is known for treading old waters. They’ve done it with every console to date. This time around, Nintendo did the Jason goes to Space idea.

Let’s take it for what it is, I am Mario and my girlfriend-fiance-wife thing Princess Peach has been kidnapped again. Before I get to do the rescue bit. A gargantuan amount of stars have to be collected. In the end I succeed at rescuing the Princess who fails to put out, yet I’ve given up all hope of ever seeing any kind of sympathy from the crazy bitch.


For me, I’ve always wanted to play as Bowser and see things from his point of view. I mean on some days Mario and Bowser go-kart, melee each other, play tennis, and sometimes teamed up on the RPGs. Sure, Bowser kidnaps the Princess and all that shenanigans. At this point it’s non-begrudging.

For the most part here, Super Mario Galaxy is easily comparable to Super Mario Sunshine who was practically compared to Super Mario 64. All three are considered ‘proper’ in comparison to all those bullshit spin offs between. I’ll admit Super Mario Galaxy is fun. It’s a return to form for the most part especially in the platforming aspect. Provided we visit the usual areas. Plus watching Mario fly through space with his little hands stretched out is in a weird way charming and entertaining. The atmosphere is cute enough for kids to want to (pardon me) gravitate to the game. However, it also has an uncanny difficulty curve. Meanwhile also having some aspects of the game which is kinda fucked up. Like the moments when you force feed a star with ‘star bits’ only to see said star explode and turn into planets. Or crawling along the exterior of a Queen Bumble Bee. On the other hand boss fights are crap-tastic because the tasks are all done with swatting/spinning their projectiles right back at them.

Fighting Bowser is just about pointless. It’s like we all know at some point or another he’s going to be down six bottles of beer and five shots of vodka. This makes the final battle which is so hyped up to be anti-climatic due to the swatting and spinning tactics.


Life count in this game is unnecessary. I wish Nintendo understood this concept. While all the gimmicks involved with Super Mario Galaxy. However, when Super Mario Galaxy tries to be unique, it gets in the way of being fun. Such as the gravity mechanic, which wasn’t as well produced as an illusion till Dead Space took a jab at it, and all the strange camera angles makes it hard to understand if a sudden step, shift of flail will send Mario where I want him to be. Or it will send Mario right into a void. Plus, it’s not comfortable to have to shake the Wii-mote all the time. About an hour into playing the game and I had developed early wanker’s wrist. Just a heads up, this didn’t stop me from playing to the end. Let’s face it, 100% completion is really there for psychos who don’t have real lives.

In the end, you could do worst than Super Mario Galaxy. However, it would have been a game which would have been better played on the Nintendo Game Cube. Yes, you heard it here…. This game completely undermines the console it was supposed to sell. For the most part, I’m kinda curious where the saga goes from here. The ending didn’t really give me the warm fussy feelings I thought I would get. Certainly any direction other than backwards is going to be a shot in the foot. On the other hand Nintendo has an option of doing a reboot for the Nintendo Switch.


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